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Everything

from Gemini by 엔도Endo

/

lyrics

I give it all give my everything
I try to do fucking everything
How can I go an do everything
And still I ain't got fucking anything

I cannot focus
집중을 못해 on anything
I cannot choose
선택하기 싫어 just one thing
I cannot do this
Wasting my time daydreaming
I feel so useless
Wading in water without ever swimming
I've fallen ill with an unknown sickness
Looking for cures while ignoring the symptoms
So scared of looking, looking within
That I much rather put the blame all on the system
This isn't my fault I've done my best
I took all the courses and took all the tests
I went learned everything that I need
To be the grown man I'm supposed to be
I wonder what lesson it is I'm forgetting
Maybe the knowledge is not what I'm lacking
I payed all my dues and I'm paying my taxes
But how the hell am I supposed to get past this

I give it all give my everything
I try to do fucking everything
How can I do fucking everything
And still I ain't got fucking anything

It's a recovery, strap for a mission
Saving myself from my own machinations
Dug myself in, time to get myself out
Clearing my head of all of my doubts
Why'd I have to lie to myself, was it worth it now
Now I'm by myself said it's fine, I done screwed myself
I'm not gonna cry I'll be fine, I done that enough
Say I'm better now

What's it feel like to be proud
Cause all that I have is my pride
Numb to the very sensation
Of feeling that joyful elation
Built up my life without setting foundations
Thought I was finished thought I was amazing
Loving my work without loving myself
Ain't that a disaster just waiting to happen
I burned all the bridges who need the connections
Heart to the head it just cause complications
That's what I thought but I fucking lost
What made me happy my fucking loss
Fuck all the fakin' and fuck all the blaming
They my mistakes I best get to fixing
Stacking my blessings Cash in soon enough
I'm living my best life and no one can take it

It's a recovery, strap for a mission
Saving myself from my own machinations
Dug myself in, time to get myself out
Clearing my head of all of my doubts
Why'd I have to lie to myself, was it worth it now
Now I'm by myself said it's fine, I done screwed myself
I'm not gonna cry I'll be fine, I done that enough
Say I'm better now

credits

from Gemini, released December 16, 2020
Written by 엔도 Endo
Performed by 엔도 Endo
Produced by Cam Stacey
Mixed by Cam Stacey
Mastered by Cam Stacey

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엔도Endo Chicago, Illinois

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